Even if the kids in these cliques are momentarily on top of the world, Robbins says the traits they are learning could be toxic in their future lives. "When you are in the popular crowd you are more likely to be conformist, you are more likely to hide aspects of your identity in order to fit into the crowd, you are more likely to be involved in relational aggression, you are more likely to have goals of social dominance rather than forming actual true friendships," Robbins says, pausing for a breath. "You are more likely to let other people pressure you into doing things. None of those things is admirable or useful as adults."
Meanwhile, the outsiders, including a young girl who earnestly told Robbins she had to accept that she would be on the bottom of the social food chain for the rest of her life, are much more self-aware and honestly much braver than the popular students. They are sticking to being themselves in the environment that makes it most difficult to do so.
So what is leading kids (and sometimes teachers) to enforce rigid hierarchies in high school? Robbins singles out the No Child Left Behind federal education law as one culprit. When you gear the classroom to a standardized test you take away the creativity and the spontaneity and innovation and the fun out of learning.
Comformity and Authenticity are completely different.